Category: Towards PhD!

The energy to resist, the energy for joy

Diwali celebrations on the streets of Southall, London, 1984. (via @brownhistory in Instagram) There are two things that I was not quite prepared for post-PhD, and those are 1) how quickly you were expected to get to work, and 2) there really is never an end to the imposter syndrome (but if you are never […]

What a feminist act

Joanne Petit-Frère, Tapestry of Braids #1 (Woven while Discovering bell hooks on YouTube), 2020 (via Something I Saw) My job interview went well yesterday, I think, and I have come to realise that I might be hired (again) because of my tweets. Apparently the CEO had been following me for quite sometime and had seen me tweeting […]

Words have weight

“I don’t feel like writing today!” I screamed into the void of my self-imposed consistency within my limited and deteriorating personal bandwidth that I have pretty much used up recklessly and without a care for my own health over the years. It is funny how I keep saying to my friends — it’s the pandemic, […]

Worry stone

The week after successfully defending my PhD thesis, my life fell into its normal routine — which is to say in this current global pandemic, still hadn’t secured a job, depleting financial savings, worried of my mother’s health and mine in this neverending purgatory, and ready to guard the house in a kebaya on Eid […]

What good shall I do with this knowledge now?

If it isn’t quite obvious from the picture above, I have passed my viva examination with minor corrections! While I understand having nerves would be natural in times like this, I was initially shitting hard, concrete, rigged bricks. My viva was scheduled to be on Friday morning and I have scheduled a practice with a […]

Viva week!

“Halloween in Harlem“, Amy Stein. Taking a break from writing non-work things this week as it is my PhD viva voce examination week! In the meantime, wash your hands, keep your social distance, stay home if you can, vow to fight fascism, and wish me luck! 🧿

On thin places

Someone in my Twitter timeline today, of whose newsletter I am subscribed to, wailed, “I don’t want to send a newsletter today, I don’t feel like it!” and it was echoed by a number of other people, which I find both surreal and funny, of whose newsletters I am subscribed too as well. I wanted […]

Culture of idiots

I forgot how the whole pursuit of job searching is a job by itself. Writing self-promoting paragraphs after paragraphs, assessing which companies would fit your values, trying to determine how much you are going to be paid at the same wary you might be asking for so much (or so little?), being overwhelmed with so […]